Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
Missing both credit cards and just had a flashback of grinding my nuts on the terrified cab driver for amusement. i am feeling a slight hate for myself right now.
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
"Little drunk?" Honey you were "livetweeting" Sublime's "Sublime" album while it was playing in his car, and at one point you said you hoped they play Santeria. "Little drunk" doesn't cover it.
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
Randomize
