Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
Randomize
