I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
Sometimes I get in situations where I realize they think I'm smarter than I am and then it's just one more thing I have to fake.
I'm about to be a big disappointment.
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
For a man with no legs he was surprisingly good at doggy style.
I don't know whether to high-five you or stage an intervention.
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
I'm upset for all the future generations who can't drunkenly get cheesy bread
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
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