Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
my boobs just fell out on the dance floor. my wedding is totally beating your wedding
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
Your drunk self managed to not pee on anyone's bed
Go me
I'm actually proud
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
Randomize
