It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
Im partying with a unicorn. You don't even know.
The bartender just started bringing me gin and tonic in a pint glass to save himself trips...
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
where are you?
Hypothermia
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
Ran out of eye drops right after putting them in one eye. Half baked at work.
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
Randomize
