Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
Remember when I use to call my dick 'the pendulum'
wtf?
It is now the artist formerly known as 'insideyourgirlfriend'
dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
Randomize
