i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
just got out of a noise viloation because the cop recognized my roomate as his favorite chipotle burrito roller. just another reason I love ritos
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
oh my god I have a fantastic druncle story to tell you. It involves a burrito, a meltdown and a bear
The burrito and meltdown are standard, but I'm intrigued by the bear
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
Send help
My life is pants optional.
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
I'm a freaking penguin. one mate for life, and really awkward at parties
Randomize
