What part of "waking up in the crawl space of my house with a raccoon" sounds like a good night to you?
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
Last night was just one giant freudian slip.
You made out with EVERYBODY.
Can I just bleach my life?
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO BE A DRUNK WHEN ALL MY ENABLERS ARE BUSY?!
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
Randomize
