I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
I'm literally about to create a tinder account. Just so someone drives me to get food.
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
Is that strawberry winking at me??
Idk if you've ever tried hysterically crying in the shower listening to Florence + The Machine but it's honestly a life-affirming experience
Randomize
