weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
I just put on the jeans I was wearing last night and pulled 4 baby carrots out of my back pocket....
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
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