careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
Every time you blow me I should make a paper crane and we'll make them into a chain and hang them from the ceiling. And then whenever we have people over and they ask what the cranes are for I'll say "reminders" and wink at you.
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
Randomize
