I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
your room smells of hookers.
And success
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
I am 95% sure I just heard my cat say "What are you doing home? It's Saturday night."
That isn't the worst part. It got a bazillion times more awkward when he read me a poem he wrote about his dead cat.
Randomize
