I'm dying. Please wear something slutty to my funeral.
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
woke up to two girls crawling on top of me forcefeeding me bacon. Best. Hangover. Ever.
Randomize
