dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
Randomize
