you mean i was at the winter classic?
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
The bachelorette party was all fun and games until the strippers came. AKA you guys.
I apologize for chief "dances with dolphins" sucking on your friends foot
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
Randomize
