I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
So there I was praying he didn't go limp again, choking on a long, long gray ball hair. This is my Saturday night. This. Is. My. Life.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
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