I love how our sober spotter means you only have to stay sober enough to type your pin in an ATM
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
I am going to piss jack daniels before daylight.
Daylight. It is daylight. Who will give you a ride back?
I hope no one. I want to walk and have a bus hit me.
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
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