i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
hahaha! you have a girlfriend
tell that to the new girl at work who i screwed on the washing machine today...
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
You stole my crutches last night at the bar, the DJ had to ask for them to be returned
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
Randomize
