dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
Tequila bombs in champagne seemed like a good idea at the time.
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
I pour the whiskey from now on
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
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