Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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Sorry YeahThatHappened hasn't picked any favorites yet.

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(484): View more from Pennsylvania

Apparently oprah and I were in competition to see who's ass could get bigger this summer

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(734): View more from Michigan

you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"

Fav 34 5056 2810
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(901): View more from Tennessee

I think the secretary can hear it when I fart in the bathroom, how do you think she feels about that?

Fav 13 1131 3933
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(617): View more from Massachusetts

he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time

Fav 21 1400 5854
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(913): View more from Kansas

It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...

Fav 17 5597 2285
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(920): View more from Wisconsin

You texted me "Americans are sad" and "chicken coop disaster" without any further explanation.

Fav 2 2854 945
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(770): View more from Georgia

Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.

Fav 20 3019 1250
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(928): View more from Arizona

He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.

Fav 2 314 590
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(337): View more from Louisiana

Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?

Fav 0 35 4
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