so my bro's bff came over...we had an awkward "yeah we fucked and can fuck later, but let's just pretend it didn't happen in front of the family" hug.
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
I spent three hours in the ER last night to figure out that my friend just had to take a shit
It's a sad day when ur phone automatically updates u on Thursdays that traffic is normal and how long it will take to get to the bar
That's fucking great actually
i think i just lost a toe
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
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