Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
I had tater tots and weed with a stripper at 4am who compared the size of my boob to her head because fuck you my life rocks
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
