hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
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