I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
WHY ARE THERE NO BLACK EMOJIS? I CAN NEVER PROPERLY IDENTIFY MYSELF.
i got to hold a baby today and i loved it and i want a baby but actually i'm going to make an appointment to get birth control now.
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
Randomize