I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
Just crushed a xanax into my chewing gum. Its gonna be a long, fucking up flight...
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
honestly, fuck you guys. i'm gonna get drunk by myself
Randomize
