Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity.
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
Like he's moved to LinkedIn creeping on me since he's blocked everywhere else & I'm just so confused does he think I'm going to post daily updates of my life on FUCKING LINKEDIN
My feet surprised me
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
Randomize
