Sober January is a disaster.
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"
Drunk me Does not appreciate a drunk, naked you kicking me off the couch at 3am. You have a bed here, you dick
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
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