Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
It says something about our relationship that he stole your phone to tell me about his dick at 3am and neither of us realized that wasn't you until just now
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
Randomize
