he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
I was just thinking about all the dick I could catch while I am home. But then I realized I am too lazy to get out of my pjs and leave my cat.
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
Randomize
