I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
You were visibly distraught that my boyfriend and I didn't have sex in your bed. You forced us to take your condoms.
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
I changed his name in my phone to "Irrelevant" last night. Not changing it back.
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
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