some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
I consider myself an expert at getting drunk and embarrassing people at weddings.
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
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