btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
i am not allowed to pick the men i sleep with anymore
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
your brother just told me that Guinness is the first book of the Bible...
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
Couple in the hotel room next to me keep fucking. When I hear her get close I call the room wait for them to stop and hang up. If I'm not getting any tonight then no one should.
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
I'm trying to find a fanny pack so I can bring pizza on my run
I just turned down the best booty call of my life because I have to make a cheesecake. I guess this is growing up.
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
Randomize
