I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
You know we have no secrets, right? I mean, you saw me shitting in a gift bag drunk and naked on Christmas eve.
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
Randomize
