My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
I think my new low is running outside in a towel to pet a particularly fluffy looking squirrel and projectile vomiting off the balcony.
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
Randomize
