Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
Emoji's do wonders when you actually have nothing at all to say..
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
I DO have hobbies! I drink. I drink more. I catfish men on Grindr with photos of guys who are less attractive than me. I listen to Lovecraftian podcasts. I'm very well-rounded.
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
Randomize
