i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
Reason #82 that I need to get laid: my pubes are getting split ends.
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
woke up holding a soft boiled egg cup and empty bottle of rum. apparently i couldn't find a shot glass
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
Soooooo I may or may not have accidentally been a catalyst in a destroyed marriage.
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
Randomize
