Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
I vaguely remember taking a shit behind the shed before I started puking over the fence. No more Xanax.
Saw a sign earlier "Domino's Lava Cakes $3.00" and I thought of you. This text brought to you by thing I don't need to know about your sex life.
He made me this shot called the allergen. It was a shot of vodka with a Claritin dropped in it.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
whose parrot is this?
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
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