Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
after you threw up, you tried to prove you were sober by reading the ingredients off the shampoo bottles
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
Scratch one off the douchebag bucket list. Just saw a guy in a sesame street tshirt and a tap out hat. Didn't get the memo that big bird's trying to get into mma.
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
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