do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
It's like a parade of train wrecks.
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
don't bother texting me at 10. my pants WILL be off and I'm not putting them back on to come see you.
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
Randomize
