So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
Whose surfboard did we steal and why is there a wood carving of a pelican in the fridge where the beer used to be?
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
Do you know how I hurt my ankle or my shoulder? Or the origin of any of the following mystery bruises: left quad, left wrist, right elbow. Thanks for playing.
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
Randomize
