Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
my boobs just fell out on the dance floor. my wedding is totally beating your wedding
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
I would totes be making out with random people in the name of america if I was at the white house right now
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
Randomize
