Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
Flowers- 20. Dinner-50. Drinks- 25. Hotel- 150. The look on his face when I tell him I'm on my period? Priceless.
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
He just sent me a dick pic with his iPod held up next to it and the words "in relation to iPod." Geekiest booty call ever.
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
Randomize
