she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
Yeah well, last time I said I wasn't having a big night I was being strangled in somebody's spare bed
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
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