i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
how do you play pong handcuffed?
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
Btw I puked in your glovebox
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
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