She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
Randomize
