I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
I mean I made my therapist laugh so hard she cried....so yes, my life is literally a joke to everyone
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
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