have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
Sexting Captain while emailing my eharmony match about my low key weekend is hard.
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
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