It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
just woke up with an anonymous loaf of bred in my bed and a piece in my mouth. this says alot about my life.
ugh. my friday night is playin' Farmville on my face. time to harvest the blackheads...
The second he texted me with "*dry humps you!*" I knew any relationship we might have had was over.
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
Not as awesome as someone telling you that you have the biggest tits they've ever seen. And they're like 30-something, so they've seen a decent amount of tits in their lifetime.
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
I just called my kid butt plug. Does that make me a bad mommy??
This may be the most diplomatic thing you've ever said
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