do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
Drinking at work by myself... My boss just walked into me copying my face on the copy machine..
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
Randomize
