Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
i just jacked off to lindsey vonn, i feel so patriotic
USA! USA! USA!
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
I KNOW. I'm like, ew who are these ppl. And then I remember I'm traveling to New York to accidentally hook it with two different dudes in one weekend.
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
Randomize
